My fight with facebook and the stapler

This is sadly how I spent most of my Friday...

8:30 – Discover facebook is no longer the cool toy it once was. I can’t find out which friends recently updated or any status updates. How am I going to be able to stalk everyone now??

8:40 – Send facebook a feedback message, probably the first I’ve ever done. “I can’t find where to check for updates on people! Why did you change facebook??”

9:30 – Grading papers, and my stupid stapler broke. Head to facebook to write as my status, “Fighting with the stapler…and it’s winning” and find out I can’t do that because I don’t know HOW to do it again.

9:38 – Send facebook a second feedback message. “I can’t even figure out how to change my status!!! WHY DID YOU DO THIS??? I have easily dealt with EVERY CHANGE you guys have done EXCEPT for this one!!!!”

10:15 – Threw away stapler. Gotta do a press release now.

10:35 – Going to purchase new stapler.

10:37 – Make sure the university is buying the stapler. You know, budget cuts and all.

10:46 – Buy (with university’s low funds) the exact same stapler as the one I put in the trash. Wonder about the sanity of the person who buys the same stapler (though in a different color) as the one she just lost a fight with.

11:03 – Had to get back on facebook for work (seriously)…Everybody else can do status updates, it looks like. What the heck is wrong with me?

11:16 – Venturing again to facebook to see if I can figure this stuff out.

11:18 – Come to the conclusion that if you want to facebook stalk people (which probably isn’t cool, but I like seeing who gets engaged, if people uploaded new pics, etc…) you have to be on facebook ALL the time. Which also isn’t cool.

11:19 – Decide to contact facebook directly. Also considering switching back to myspace. Also just realized that when you click on the question “How do I contact facebook directly” it leads you to other people who are having the same problems. Now, that’s stupid.

11:24 – Sent the following note to facebook: “Okay, this is starting to get ridiculous. I understand that you probably have millions of people who want to e-mail you directly, but you're a big company. You need better customer support here. I clicked on "How do I contact facebook," and it took me to a page with other people having the same problems. Blind leading the blind, you know? Look, the bottom line is that I can't stay on facebook all day because I have work and a "real" life, but I do like finding out who got engaged and seeing when new pics are uploaded and stuff like that. But I can't tell when people do that now, and I don't even know how to update my status. So can you please, please, please have some site where I can see status updates and recent updates like the old one? I understand you want to update the site, but for Pete's sake, please have the info easily accessible.”

11:41 – New pearl blue stapler works like a charm.

12:44 – Tried to beat the facebook system. Died like road kill.

12:45 – Suddenly shocked that I’ve spent so much time concerned about facebook.

4:45 – One of my students come in to visit, and I complain to her about facebook. She shows me very simply the dumb mistakes I was making. I feel very, very old.

Hopefully today will be more productive. ;)