Friday, February 19, 2010

Grading finals

Thoughts that run through my head as I grade my students’ final columns…

Seriously? Do you REALLY think I’m going to believe that you just “forgot” to attach it?

So you were “sick,” were you? Hungover from Mardi Gras, as YOU stated on Facebook, does not count as being “sick.”

Why are you not citing information? Don’t you know that’s plagiarism?

Pretending that your final assignment doesn’t exist will not make your zero will disappear.

What the heck? Did you take a dumb pill when you wrote this?

Wow. Someone’s bitter about his ex-girlfriend (as noted from the multiple, “She’ll always cheat on you” and “Girls are players” that he wrote).

Is this another made up story?

What, did this final paper surprise you? Yes, I suppose receiving three e-mails about it and voting about it in class, seeing it on the syllabus AND the fact that I gave you seven extra days to work on it would come as a surprise.

I need a diet coke.

11 comments:

Brooke said...

do you get an extra crown in heaven for this??

Mari said...

Ha! A friend and I from work have been saying we need to write a book with crazy excuses people make when calling in. Maybe you could do a chapter on excuses for not doing homework!

Kayla said...

Love it. It's amazing what some students come up with! Hope you got that Diet Coke! :-)

Rachel @ Future Pastor's Wife said...

I love your student posts!

destination262 said...

lol - that is hilarious!

Joyeful said...

And I always thought being a professor would be so glamourous : ) Lol!! What you have to put up with!

P.S. you were in my town on the snow day! How fun! So sad you missed your own flurries, though.

misti said...

HAHA! That is why I am not FB friends with my teachers...

Brittany Ann said...

You know what? I've missed teaching college. Until now. Thank you for the reminder!

Ginger said...

Tooo funny! Sounds like those students keep you busy!
Ginger

I would need a Diet Dr. Pepper or coffee after that. (Like in your previous post, yes it goes awesome w/King Cake--especially the Bavarian Cream Cheese.). You and Rena can have the Diet Coke... ha!

septembermom said...

You could write a book with all this material!!

Aleta said...

With so much technology and advances in communication, you would think the excuses would become more creative. Lol.